Online Dating 101

A few weeks ago, for my first post I talked about online dating do’s and don’ts. I thought I would return to the subject given that Bandeka will soon be launching some cool new features in a few weeks. I actually spent the weekend testing these out, and I’m really excited! I can’t wait until everything goes live :). I thought for this post I would give you a couple quick words of wisdom to make your experience on Bandeka as successful as possible when you join the site!

1. Your Profile Picture Matters!

Call it shallow/ superficial, but it is true. Your profile picture is the first thing people see, and it is what they base their decision on when it comes to clicking on your profile or clicking ‘next’. Because your picture is the first representation of you, it’s only logical to put your best foot forward; it’s not until your foot is in the door that that amazing guy or gal can “get to know your personality”. Note: if your best foot isn’t a recent foot, use some discretion, but stay true to yourself – no one likes a bait-and-switch situation.

Our friends over at okcupid made a comment that I cannot agree with more: “an unfortunate truth of online dating: no matter how much time you spend polishing your profile, honing your IM banter, and perfecting your message introductions, it’s your picture that matters most.”*

2. Your Messaging Matters!

A couple months ago, there was a hilarious piece featured on CNN on online dating. The authors discuss seven types of messagers that do NOT get message replies on dating sites. I’ve listed the types below, given an example of each, and provided a quick explanation of why no one wants these types of messagers. For more, read the full article here:

1. The Generalizer: “hey, wuts up?”

-> You’re probably stupid. Or possibly illiterate.

2. The Autobiographer: “Hi! My name is Sandi! I moved to L.A. from Oklahoma a couple of months ago and, I have to say, I’m lovin’ it! I just adore walking my 6-year-old Pomeranian, Marshmallow, along Venice Beach!”

-> Well, what else is there to find out? We kind of feel like we’ve already dated you, and we were bored the first time around.

3. The ‘Eccentric’:  “Holy Cheezburgers! You sure are a purty lady! I would love to take you down to the playground and push you on the swings! And then we can go to the zoo! Or to the ocean to build a giant sand castle by the sea!”

-> We are afraid you will murder us in our sleep.

4. The Robot: “Hi! I came across your profile and it intrigued me. I’m looking for a smart man with passion and drive, and you seem to be it! Want to get a drink sometime?”

->You probably sent the same message to half of OKCupid … and … and eHarmony … and JDate… (AND BANDEKA!).

5. The Creeper:  “Oh, here’s a picture of my junk.”

-> Cease and desist with the sexting.

6. The Gusher: “Oh my, you are extremely handsome, you know that? Like, you look like a movie star! And you like all of my favorite books! ‘The Da Vinci Code!’ “

-> Kindly detach yourself from my leg. Calling someone “sexy,” “beautiful” or “hot” is a huge turnoff in a first message.

7. The Wordless Wonder: “You have been added to PatrickBatemanIsTheMan’s Favorite’s List!”

-> Man up and say something